Online Menu
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Darrell's Diner Online Menu |
Here's a complete listing of everything Darrell serves at his diner on the interstate, including items no longer available and items he's experimenting with. Click a button below to scroll down.
Barton Buffalo Wings
The original Darrell Barton Buffalo Wings. Spicy, succulent, soaked in hot oil for that extra-crispy crunch! Used to be on Thursdays you could get real buffalo (see No Longer Available below).
American French Fries
French fries American style. Regular, spicy, or the extra-special Barton fries are available, and Barton fries just recently became available to non-regulars thanks to the Department of Health.
Bread and Butter
Made Darrell-style and that means light on the bread, heavy on the butter! Margarine is also available. Sorry, due to customer complaints, lard is no longer available
Nacho Chips
Darrell's nacho chips are famous for staying crisp even when smothered in the vast amounts of hot, spicy nacho cheese. Rumors indicate that the chips are coming from a source that is "out of this world." Draw your own conclusions.
Tossed Salad
Every time the Health Department visits, they ask Darrell to define "tossed", just to be safe. Dressings include Thousand Island, Italian, Ranch, and Catalina.
More to come, real soon!
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Chunky Chicken Noodle
Beefy Beef Vegetable
Creamy Clam Chowder
Spicy Split Pea
Darrell's Chili
More to come, real soon!
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1/2 lb. Belly Buster Burger Basket
Fish & Chips Basket
Gourmet Vegetarian Festival
Darrell's Chili Combo
Ham in a Holster
Leg of Lamb Meal
More to come, real soon!
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The Rue McLanahan
Darrell's Malts
Old Stand-bys
More to come, real soon!
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Goat Chowder
Buffalo Wings with Real Buffalo Meat
Underwear Pie
More to come, real soon!
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Darrell is currently using the neighborhood cats to try out the following dishes:
Grasshopper Kettle Stew
Macho Muncho Luncho Liftoff
Rabbit Prime Rib
Darrell's Homemade Soups
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Darrell is quite proud of his chicken chunks, as any chicken chomping chum would be.
Not meaning to be sexist, but this is one manly soup.
Darrell uses only the finest in canned clam to make this exquisite dish. He also finds the firmest potatoes for the almost mouth-sized spud chunks. Not to be confused with Darrell's Goat Chowder (see No Longer Available).
Who said split peas and jalapenos were a bad combination? Not Darrell, that's for sure.
This is just a bowl of chili. For the full effect, see Entrees.
Darrell's Main Courses
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Aren't we all hungry after hours of traveling on the interstate? Well Darrell has something that's sure to fill you up. Darrell's old fashioned 1/2 lb. hamburger (all the fixin's, no less) comes with Double Deep Fried Onion Rings, Spicy Fries, and 2 chewable Tums tablets. (NOTE: Darrell's Diner is in no way responsible for customer's cholesterol level after consuming the Burger Basket)
There ain't much seafood in Nebraska but Darrell finds ways to get the freshest fish for his big 1/4 lb. fish patties. The basket comes with Darrell's special tartar sauce and a healthy helping of the famous Barton Fries.
Darrell used his keen salesman sense to slap a fancy label on this boring dish. It's just a big bowl of steaming, healthy, garden-grown vegetables, that's all. Darrell himself never touches the stuff--not enough oil to keep the gears going, you know?
The ultimate in Plains Chili. First, you have a big steaming bowl of Darrell's Chili which consists of beef chunks, spicy peppers, chili beans, tomato cubes, jalapenos, and a long list of secret ingredients. Next to that sits a small pile of soup crackers, a man-sized roll, and a Rue McLanahan. Most people have never seen the bottom of the bowl, but have gone through many glasses of water.
Not to be confused with Chicken in a Basket. Darrell gets two thick slices of premium ham ("...from pigs, Inspector. Pigs.") and gets 'em all riled up by covering them with a heavy coating of mozzarella cheese. This dish gets its title because the cheese toughens up and loosens its grip on the meat, allowing for retrieval if that's how you like it. A Darrell's Diner exclusive, for sure. Comes with fries and that little green leaf on the side for color.
Darrell probably wouldn't know what you were talking about if you didn't order this by saying "Leg of L'Meal". It's been abbreviated by the locals and the name has stuck. Comes with mashed potatoes and your choice of corn or green beans.
Darrell's Drinks
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That is, a tall drink of water. Darrell has always been a huge fan of Rue McLanahan of Golden Girls fame, so he honored her with a menu item. Comes with every dine-in order, in a glass tinted to match Rue McLanahan's hair color.
The Health Department recently ordered Darrell to put up a sign about his high-quality malts. The door now clearly states, "Malts sold in this establishment may cause drowsiness, nausea, or sexual urges. Please drink responsibly." That warning has nearly doubled Darrell's malt sales. Chocolate, vanilla, and mocha flavors at this time (see Experiments)
Naturally, Darrell offers milk, water, and Faygo(c) products, as well as coffee and orange juice. There's only one size glass, which makes them very easy to replace.
Items no Longer on Darrell's Menu
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What is clam? A tender meat. What is goat? A tender meat (if you whack it enough). So what's wrong with goat chowder? According to Darrell, it tasted better than his clam chowder because the goats had been dead for less than a day whereas the clams are at least a week old. Regulars suggested Darrell drop this item 2 weeks after its debut.
Darrell has never liked the Nebraska Department of Natural Resources. The case was dismissed because of a mistrial (Darrell insists to this day that he knew none of the jurors and that the judge was not his 3rd cousin), but Darrell decided he'd better stay out of trouble so he removed the item from the menu. Shame, too, because that was his biggest attraction on Thursdays.
It's not what you think. Darrell had always thought that the ladies underwear section of Kmart smelled like apple pie, so that's what he called it. So now just ask for apple pie and make sure Darrell doesn't drift off into a daydream.
Darrell's Experiments
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A zesty stew with potato chunks, carrot slices, and peas. Mmm... I can just taste those chewy sweet grasshoppers now.
It's a perfect meal for the man (or husky woman) on the go. There's a burger, Barton fries, and a drink included, and it's all packaged to be eaten in a speeding pickup truck. Darrell has the whole meal worked out, he just can't think of a better name. Suggest a name
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